66. Woolly Mammoths

Woolly Mammoth

Hi,

I did not waste the last 20 months of comic production time. I just learned how easy it would be to waste 20 months of comic production time. Pretty easy.

Dear North Americans,

I’ve been hearing about Muslims.

TLDR: In conclusion all I really wanted to say is that Muslims in America are just barely more dangerous than cows and just a bit less dangerous than trying to take a selfie. I must warn that Christian folk in America are much more dangerous than taking selfies so take care if you’re near a church this weekend.

Some roughly accurate facts:

1.6 billion Muslims
2.2 billion Christians
500 million Buddhists
30 million Sikhs
18 million Seventh Day Adventists
14 million Jews

From this I deduce that if every Christian was friends with one Muslim there would still be 600 million Christians that would be without a Muslim friend.

We’re all just people. I get the impression that some people are afraid of Muslim people. If you are one of the 2.2 billion who believe in this kind of thing (I am), I feel like our friend Jesus might think this is silly. I always thought if one believes in the bible one didn’t have to worry about things like this.

I did some reading about how many people are dying in the world and it seems like a lot less than I would expect if Muslims (1.6 billion) were big into killing people. 3 out of 400 people die every year = 55 million total. If the Muslims or Christians decide to start killing people on principle expect that number to increase dramatically.

Seems like every few hundred years or so some people (even they are just people) kill millions of other people. That’s what some people do sometimes. It is horrific but it is not surprising. Some people in the world right now are very into killing people. They’re not Stalin level killers yet though. They’ve got nothing on Subutai, that’s for sure. Trying to keep things in perspective. Somewhere between 150,000 and 500,000 people have died in Syria since that conflict began. 3 of them were us. Either way that is not Islam, it’s war. Overall in the last 50 years the craziest killers seem to be us. Conquest of the Philippines (200,000 plus killed), Indochina war (1 million dead, many our direct responsibility), Bay of Pigs, we’re probably directly responsible for an estimated 250,000 Muslim deaths world wide since the 80’s. We’re dangerous. We’re doing all kinds of really bad stuff all over the world right now. I think we should be real happy that Muslims are coming to North America where we can’t kill them so easily. I want to be indirectly responsible for as few killings of Muslims as possible.

What about on home soil? We should be worried about Muslims here at home right? I’ve read that last year they killed roughly 25 Americans in the name of Islam in America. Oh no! And Christians in America in the name of Jesus killed 40 or so additional Americans. Though death is never trivial, both of these numbers are.

Last year in America killed by:
Sharks: 1
Taking selfies: 29 (Unfair statistic, this is worldwide numbers. Check wikipedia. There are some good ones.)
Cows: 22

In conclusion all I really wanted to say is that Muslims in America are just barely more dangerous than cows and just a bit less dangerous than trying to take a selfie. I must warn that Christian folk in America are much more dangerous than taking selfies so take care if you’re near a church this weekend.

Signing off for today,
Benjamin Boyd